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Grab a Bottle

28 Dec

I have a 9 year old daughter.  She makes me a better person. I thank God every night that he chose me to be her mom, that I get to love her and kiss her anytime I want (If you see the cute little boy from Sweet Home Alabama, you are my people!) I pray constantly that she’ll grow into a Godly woman. She has the sweetest heart and I look at her and I’m in awe.

Then I walk into her room and all the warm fuzzies are gone!  Not just gone, but dead, buried under a 2 foot pile of dog poo.  This room is my demise.  I try to ignore it as long as I can and suppress my feelings, but it never lasts.  Inevitably, I crack.  Then I go into a throwing out rage.  My daughter and I fight.  EVERYTHING.IS.SPECIAL.  Toys that she has completely forgotten about all of a sudden become the world’s greatest toy and she will tell me who gave it to her and all why her life will be utterly destroyed if I chunk it. Things are said, feelings are hurt and tears are shed. It gets ugly and I’m not proud of myself in these moments.

We got her a bunk bed for Christmas.  In order for it to fit, we had to get rid of her 3 foot tall Barbie house.  Barbie can’t be homeless so getting rid of her house means getting rid of her (all 15 of them) and her million outfits and shoes and purses and car, and if you can’t tell, I hate Barbie.  I hate everything about her and the thought of removing all of it from our house made we way happier than it should.

But I didn’t want to fight with my 9 year old and I was dreading the meltdown that was in my very near future.  I swear the Holy Spirit spoke to me.  He said “Katie, sweet and beautiful Katie with whom I am pleased.  Pour yourself a glass of wine, actually, forget the glass and grab the bottle.  Disregard the fact that it’s only 8:46 in the morning.  Let her binge watch Netflix and get in that room.”

Yall, when the Holy Spirit speaks, YOU LISTEN! I was me versus the closet.  I had God on my side so I knew I would be victorious. I shut the door so she could not enter.  The rule was she couldn’t ask me what I threw away.  Out of a whole pile, she only busted me on 1 toy, so I gave it back.

closet

Her room is so cozy, she has a reading corner and Christmas lights.  In one afternoon, it transformed from little girl’s to a big girl’s room.  She aged before my eyes.  My baby is growing is up.  I remember the day she was born, her first steps, and her first day of pre-K.  Now she gets things for me when I’m too lazy to walk across the entire grocery store and she’s on a dance team with teen agers.  She’s big, but not too big to be dropped off at her classroom door or snuggle every night at bed time.  She’s growing up and I can’t do anything about that, but for now, I’ll just hang on to her while I’m still cool.

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If Trees Could Talk

12 Sep

I’ll be the first to admit I’m not sentimental.  I throw everything away.  I don’t need 50 pictures of my kid’s foot prints or the pumpkin they drew in pre-K or the “clay pot” they made in art class.  I don’t hold on to Christmas cards, I throw them away, all of them, every year (sorry if you have sent me one, ever.)

We go camping every year on Labor Day.  I married into this tradition, my husband’s family has been going every year for 31 years and he hasn’t missed one yet.  It was mentioned that the camp site we have been going to for the last 8 years is being sold and this could possible be the last year we spend at this camp site.  This news, kinda made me sad, but not too sad because like I said, I’m not sentimental.

But I will miss a certain Cypress tree there.  This tree is magnificent.  You may or may not believe in God but there is something about this tree that screams miraculous.  You can’t be in the vicinity of this tree and not feel its power.  You can’t stand next to this tree and not feel small, like there is something bigger out there.

This tree has to be at least 500 years old and I so wish it could talk.  I can only imagine the things it has seen and conversations it has heard.   This tree is so enormous only a portion fits in the picture.  The 4 tiny people at the bottom is my family.

tree us

This tree was around when it was just the Native Americans roaming the land.  It is majestic and I wonder how many people were married under it’s branches.  I wonder how many people found solace in it’s shade.  This is kinda cryptic, but I wonder how many people have been buried by it, because honestly, can you think of a better tombstone?  It’s on the Frio River, how many floods has it stood up too?  How many droughts has it weathered?

What conversations has it heard?  “Will you marry me?”  “Honey…we need to talk.”  How many desperate people have cried out to God wondering if He really exists and if He really sees/cares about/loves them?

This tree has seen me pregnant three times.  This tree has seen my 7.5 year old daughter for 1 week every year of her life. How many other kids have grown up with this tree? How many pictures is it in?  This is our most recent camping picture, we take one just like it every year.  45 people fit in front of 1 branch. Gosh, I sure wish it could talk.

tree everybody

Large cypress trees will grow where thorn bushes were.  Myrtle trees will grow where weeds were.  These things will be a reminder of the Lord’s promise, and this promise will never be destroyed. Isaiah 55:13

I believe God is showing His mightiness and His love for us through this tree.

 

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain.

 

 

2nd Grade…insert happy dance!

26 Aug

It that time again.  It comes once a year.  It’s when all the stay home parents say “AMEN” they get some peace and quiet again and it’s that time when all the working parents say “AMEN” because they no longer have to pay a fortune on all day child care.  If you don’t what I’m talking about you must not have kids.  If you have kids you know exactly what time it is…BACK TO SCHOOL!!!!!!!

Going back to school is a wonderful day.  I am a stay home mom so this girl will be walking down the hall at 7:45am with a HUGE smile on my face doing the happy dance. But it takes a lot of preparation for this day tho.

For the last 2 weeks we have been going to bed early and getting up early.  I have a daughter that moves at the speed of molasses so mornings are stressful as we try to keep her focused and on track.  This is why we have been practicing for the last 2 weeks.  My goal is that I don’t end up screaming something like “put your doll down!  If I have to tell you to brush your teeth one more time I will just drag you to school with yucky teeth and morning breath and all the kids will call you the smelly kid and you don’t want to be the smelly kid!” (I am happy to report that no screaming, either from her or me, occurred!)

This day means literally seeing your kids get a year older.  This day means they go off on their own.  This day means they make their own choices.  Will they be good choices?  Will they be the choices you would make for them?  This day means, as parents, we let our grip on them loosen up a little bit more.  This day means they gain a little more independence.

The first day of school is wrapped up with all kinds of emotions for the kids as well as us the parents.  I am the mom that walks her child to class.  But I don’t just say bye at the door.  No sir!  I walk right in the classroom and kiss her goodbye in front of all her classmates.  I want the kids in her class to know me.  I want the kids to feel comfortable around me, but I also want them to know I if they mess with her, they have to see my face the next morning.

I am entrusting her to the teacher.  Teachers…BLESS THEM!  They have to put up with our crazy kids.  They have to wipe tears and settle disputes.  They have to teach the same thing to kids who learn differently.  They have to be stern and patient at the same time.  They have to be leaders and encouragers and stand in the gap for kids who’s parents aren’t pulling their weight.

This is my prayer for my daughter:

Lord, watch over Danica. Let her day be filled with wonder and new things. Help her make friends and get along with others. Let her not compromise herself to fit in. Help her to remember what is right and wrong and to choose right. Give her strength to defend herself and others against bullies. When the test is hard, let her remember she is smart. When girls are mean, let her remember she is loved. When boys are smooth, let her remember they are dumb. When she’s overwhelmed, let her remember your peace. Please help her to remember she is not alone and You are with her when momma and papa are not. Keep her safe and let her get really smart so when we’re old; she can afford to put us in a luxury nursing home.

Congratulations to everyone who survived the summer!!!  Happy first day of school!

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain.

Unplug

12 Aug

We have become a society enslaved to technology and social media, therefore, I declare it’s time to unplug!

Yes, I realize you are reading this on a PC, laptop, a phone or some sort of iThingy, so please wait till you’re done reading to go unplugged. I am guilty of this so this isn’t a blog where I point my finger at everyone else and tell you how bad you are. No, I am guilty as well.

Summer vacation is over in 2 weeks (let me tell you this Stay Home Mom is eagerly counting down the days till first day of school.) My 7.5 year old daughter has been reading her booty off and winning prizes at the local library. Her last prize was a coupon for a free kid’s meal at, well I’m not sure I can say the name. Lets just say they have the BEST Southwestern Egg-rolls and back in 2002 N’Sync did a commercial singing about baby back ribs…you’re welcome. 😉

It’s been a while since we ate there and I was shocked to see they had touch screens on the table to read the menu and pay your bill. My daughter noticed they had games for $.99 on there as well. She asked if she could play one. Sorry sweetie, no. But I can’t just say no. I had to give her a 5 minute lecture about how that’s one of the problems with our society today. People are addicted to technology and we can’t even sit and eat with our family without have some kind of device in our hand stealing our attention. I told her dinner is a perfect time for us all to sit together and talk. Then my husband chimed in and told her “you’re welcome for having such good parents that love you and want to talk to you.” She just looked at me like, actually she wasn’t looking at me, she was blankly staring at something over my head.

I looked around at several of the tables and kids were playing on the touch screen and parents were on their own phones and no one was talking. No sharing of stories. No laughing. No pouring out of one’s soul. No dreaming for the future. Nothing. This made me sad. Sad for the kids who were missing out on learning from their parents. Sad for the parents missing out on what’s going on in their teen-age daughter’s life.

Now, I’m gonna be honest right now. We also had our 15 month old daughter who was being vocal in a not so cute way and I would have GLADLY paid someone $.99 to come and entertain her.

I realize the appeal of technology. I understand that technology and quiet kids go hand in hand. I know that when I allow my daughter to play games on my phone I have 30 minutes of quiet time. That’s right, I said my phone. She doesn’t have a phone or a Kindle or an iPad of her own and I limit her time playing games on mine.

I’m not judging you as a parent if your kids have their own technological devices. There is nothing wrong with that. All I’m saying is lets unplug for a while. Parents, sit down and talk with your kids. Ask them how their day was and when they say “good” don’t just take that as an acceptable answer. Ask them why it was good. Ask them open ended questions and allow them to ask you questions. Kids are like a sponge and when you pour time into them, they respond.

Happy talking!

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain!

34

16 Jun

Last week I turned 34. 

It didn’t hit me hard, which is good, because I wasn’t anticipating it would.  It was just another day, well almost, the only difference was this day revolved around me.  😉 

I woke up early.  No excuses today.  I had a point to prove; I had to 34 who’s boss.  I vetoed sleeping late and breakfast in bed and ran 5 miles.  While running, I think and pray but mostly try not to fall because I’m too busy singing and dancing to my “Spice Girls” station on Pandora.  I don’t care what my husband says its the best station ever!  It plays everything from NKOTB to Destiny’s Child to Justin Timberlake to Paula Abdul…pure greatness!

My husband bought me running shoes for my birthday.  It’s like pulling teeth to get me to buy a new pair.  I will run them into the ground till my toes are about to fall off before I get new ones.  I found a beautiful, full priced, pink pair but decided to look at the clearance wall because that’s what I do.  I found the same shoe for $20 less but it was blue.  I hate paying full price for anything but I really wanted the pink pair.  My husband knew there was an internal conflict commencing in my brain and he MADE me get the pink ones…I’m glad he did because they are amazing.  I ran 5 miles the next day as well and decided to cash in my free birthday drink from Starbucks.  Thanks to social media, I snapped a picture and shared it with the whole world. lol

birthday shoes

34 has been good to me.  I have 2 daughters and a wonderful husband who works hard so I can stay home with them.  13 years ago when I was off earning my Bachelor’s Degree I never expected to be a stay home mom.  Some days are hard and I think I’m crazy for wanting another baby.  Some days are a cake walk and I think I can handle 5 more.  It’s funny how life turns out.  Just when we think we’ve got it figured out something gives.

Noting in this life is sure, there are no guarantees.  The only constant we have is God’s love.  No matter what gets thrown at us, what takes our breath away, or what drops us to our knees, we can rest in the fact that we are not alone.  God is with us.  He fights our battles for us when we are too weak.  He loves us.  He sees us and will never leave us.

Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid and do not panic before them.  For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you.  He will never fail you or abandon you.  Deut 31:6.

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain.

Stop Thinking!

28 May

Me: “Good thing you don’t have homework tonight; you’ll need to get ready for dance as soon as you get home from school.”

7 year old daughter, Danica: “Ugh grrrr, hmmm”

Me: “Um, is there a werewolf in the back seat?”

Danica: “No…”

Me: “Ok, do you want to tell me why you’re growling?”

Danica: “The dance recital is coming up and I’m afraid I’ll mess up.”

Me: “Oh baby, I mess up all the time.”

Danica: “I know.”

Me: “Thanks for that. The only perfect person who ever walked this earth was whom?”

Danica: “Jesus.”

This happened a few days ago and I can’t stop thinking about it.  Did I handle it correctly?  How do I validate her feelings while trying to calm her fears?  How do I tell her it’s normal to be scared yet reassure her everything will be ok?  How do I turn this everyday conversation into a meaningful, heartfelt one?

Well first, I stop thinking because I can think myself into a headache.  And when I have a headache I want a Coke, and I don’t need a Coke, so stop thinking Katie!

All I can do is listen.  I’m great listener but a not so good calmer.  My first response it to say “calm down killer.  In the grand scheme of life your dance recital won’t make one bit of difference.”  This is usually when my husband steps in and reminds me that in her 7 year old world, this isn’t just a big deal, it’s the only deal.  I try to focus on the big picture so much that I forget the small moments matter because they make up the big picture.

I hope I’m not the only mamma out there struggling with this.  I hope I’m not the only one who worries that I trample over her feelings, that I give bad advice or that I gave advice when all she wanted was a hug.  I tell her “when life gets hard, shake your booty.”  I try so hard to make her tough that I forget she’s 7 and just wants me to wipe her tears and kiss her elbow.

To all the mammas out there (and the papas, I know a few of you read my blog) you’re doing a great job!  Stop thinking and just be.  Be the listener, the advice giver and the hugger.  If you mess up, be the parent that says you’re sorry.  Relax and just breathe; your kids think you’re way better than you think you are.

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain.

What Kind of a Stranger are You

21 Apr

Stranger Danger!!!   AAAhhhhh (insert kids running around yelling and waving hands in the air.)

I just pulled into my driveway after dropping my oldest daughter off at the school the other morning.  As I walked around the car to get the baby out, I noticed a girl on the other side of the street looking at me.  It was cold outside and all she had on was a summer dress.  She was super tiny and the instrument she was fighting with was as big as she was.  She smiled at me sheepishly and struggled down the street.  My heart started hurting.  She desperately needed help.  I could offer her a ride but I needed to get the baby to bed and get some chores done.  Then I envisioned a man with a cigarette, driving a white painter’s van, pulling up beside her and offering a ride.  (Yes, I have a vivid imagination, this is why my blog is called Ridiculous Katie.)

I’ve seen her before but today she looked extra pathetic and I decided nothing bad was gonna happen to her on my watch so I put the baby back in the car and offered her a ride.  She stood there a moment thinking.  Then she said “please” and got in.  She just got in the car with a complete stranger!!!!  I wanted to yell at her and tell her how stupid that was!!!  I wanted to lecture her for not wearing a jacket and to learn how to play a smaller instrument.  I wanted to steal her phone and call her mom and tell her to have another talk about stranger danger because obviously she wasn’t paying attention!

I didn’t.  I gave her the best smile I could fake and just talked to her.  She’s in 6th grade and lives half a mile from school which is too close for the bus to pick her up so she walks.  And sometimes the “C” on her euphonium (like a tuba but only a tad bit smaller) gets stuck.  Ok, enough small talk, time to get down to business.

I realize the irony here but I needed to stress the importance of NEVER getting in the car with a stranger.  I needed to know she wouldn’t do this again.  I tried to explain to her that even though I’m a stranger, I’m a good stranger but not all strangers are and she should never do this again and if a man pulls up beside her in a van, she needs to run away as fast as she can and on the opposite side of the big sliding door.

What kind of stranger are you?  Are you one that will go out of your way to brighten someone’s day or are you the kind that won’t?  Are you the person that smiles at the mom with the screaming kid at the store or are you the kind that knows saying something snarky is EXACTLY what the mom needs to hear at that moment?  Do you let the very pregnant lady use the restroom first or do you stand there like you don’t see her?  Do you slow down to let the car in or do you follow them, road raging the whole way, and flip them off?

Lets vow to be better strangers.  Lets look at others and not judge them or decide is our duty to teach them a lesson or inform them of how and why they suck.  Let’s love others as ourselves and lets start today!

 

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain.