Archive | September, 2013

God Knows What I Do Not

25 Sep

It’s no secret I’ve been ready for another child for several years now. When Brandn and I decided to move to Austin I knew my baby plans would be put on hold. I’ve blogged about the frustrations of how my plans didn’t line up with God’s plans. I’ve blogged about watching family members and friends having sweet little babies and being happy for them, but sad for myself knowing it’s not my time yet. I’ve blogged about the pain of having a miscarriage.

Now, I finally get to blog about the excitement of being 10 weeks knocked up!! That’s right, I said knocked up. The only thing I know about this baby is that it’s the size of a small strawberry, has eyelids and little knobby fingers and toes. I have no idea if it’s a boy or girl. I have no idea when we’ll finally get to meet baby. I have no idea what baby’s passions and frustrations will be or what will delight and break baby’s heart.

But I find great comfort in the fact that God does. God knows everything. God is love, and He loves our sweet little baby. God knows when baby will come screaming into this earth. God knows what baby’s name will be. (I have my names picked out and I have 7 months to convince my husband he likes these names…wish me luck.) He knows what will get baby’s heart racing both out of excitement and fear. He knows what baby will blow off and what injustices baby will fight. He knows if baby will be healthy or if we will endure the pain of watching our child be sick knowing we can do nothing. He knows if baby will be smart, funny, full of attitude, a musician, horrible at sports, kind hearted or a royal pain in the butt.

I know none of these. I have my hopes but I don’t know what the future holds. I know that God is in control and I find peace in that.

Psalm 139:13-16 – For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Jeremiah 1:5 – Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.
God has a plan for this baby’s life and I’m honored to be along for the ride.

Thanks for allowing me to share my world with you…welcome to my brain.